Tekster: Shaun Boothe. The Reporter.

INTRO:

This is add news with anchorman Shaun Boothe
And five time anchorman of the year Travis Zimmerman
And now to the news desk


Travis:
Hi, my name is Travis Zimmerman and welcome to ADD news
I'm here reporting live with anchorman Shaun Boothe. Shaun?

VERSE 1:

Shaun:
Thanks Travis and thank you all for tuning in
Now before you start tuning out lets begin
With the new trend to eat more and move less
Obesity is now the new leading cause of death
Yup, a hamburger is more likely to murder you than a black man's burner
In further news, according to law enforcers
The difference between police brutality and order is really a camcorder
And recent polls extended the end of an era
Of a little moron and his war on terror
But president Bush insists he's not drilling for oil
Those weapons of mass destruction are in the soil
And while less and less people are working
The least threatened occupation is the cosmetic surgeon
Finally not to disrupt natural order
The rich continue to get richer while the poor get poorer

CHORUS:

Travis:
Well ok then, moving right along
Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah
In the world news, everything is going wrong and
Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah
Nevertheless, kids don't forget
Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah
This is the news, This is the news
Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah

VERSE 2:

Shaun:
Studies show that nobody knows a damn thing
So they buy into whatever studies show
But contrary to racial profiling
All young black males are NOT prone to violence
And being Arabic doesn't guarantee you're a terrorist
Solemnly sworn to some code of silence
And in business news, seems the gas crisis
Was really a marketing scheme to jack prices
And judging by how high they are
We'll get the electric chair before the electric car
But all the poverty and violence
No one's got time to worry about the environment
But that hole in the ozone lair didn't go nowhere
So wear some sun block if you got your nose in the air
SPF 15 and up
Now pay attention white folks cause I don't need the stuff
70 acres of nature are lost each minute
And possibly the cure to a lot of disease with it
Sad but true, but don't worry you'll forget it by tomorrow afternoon
Travis back to you

CHORUS:

Travis:
Great stuff, moving right along Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah
In the world news, everything is going wrong and Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah
Nevertheless, kids don't forget Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah
This is the news, This is the news Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah

VERSE 3:

Shaun:
According to Fashin File
A 'must have' for every celeb is an African child
And in even lighter news, when it come to lookin sexier
Nine out of ten models prefer bolemia to anorexia
And with the warning shots cops (are) lettin go
Live now 'cause you never know
And remember folks
If I ain't say it - it ain't worth repeatin'
Signing off I'm Shaun Boothe - better know as SEAZON